LIFE LATELY

i might have a couple drafts that i started on random day, started while trying to come back on here. i used to be so excited about blogging years ago when life was more simple. i seriously don't know how some mamas blog regularly. its not that i don't always have time time. i browse around from time to time, other blogs, pinterest, facebook, random photos of animals with a joke on it.
but to actually start a post and feel satisfied with it is difficult at the time. there has been a good amount of stress in life recently. since my friend was diagnosed with leukemia, my grandpa died and on top of that raoul was touring europe for a month. honestly, a month isn't too crazy but when i had my mind on family and friends and then the kids get diarrhea, yea its hard. i tend to come to this little blog of mine and vent when i need to, when my mind is restless. and i don't seek sympathy, although i have an amazing group of friends with such great hearts and advice. i am here because this is my real life. and these struggles aren't pretty but they are part of me. it was hard to not let out the cries that i was holding up during my friend's first chemo treatment. but we're getting through it. things are looking up already and for that i am grateful.
then, there is niko's school that has me going insane from time to time. i love niko's school and so does he. its a co-op so its very parent involved, which i also love. before niko started school i was worried about the influence other kids would have on him. the bad kids, whose parents don't care and it shows on the kids. but we have some awesome families at nikos school and we have learned so much from each other. we all volunteer a couple times a month and every even is planned together.
which leads me to my most recent headache, niko's preschool graduation. its not actually a headache. i am really looking forward to the ceremony because i know it will be filed with happy memories and tears of joy. what i had a hard time with was the fundraising and fees for unnecessary things. its one of those things where i would have been wrong if i didn't say anything and i was wrong for saying something anyways. but i made my point and even though my opinion wasn't valued and i got my start in school involvement. i am proud to be that mom. i am not the greatest mom, i know that. but i am really trying.

 

photos taken with instagram

i was invited to watch depeche mode on the jimmy kimmel show the day raoul got back from europe. i actually had to be at the jimmy kimmel live studios three hours before raoul got into lax. i felt bad leaving but after a month of chaos with the kids and zero breaks, i had to get out. for my own sanity, and i did. it was great, depeche mode performed seven songs outside in the perfect afternoon weather and my friends and i were able to go to the green room. the green room is where the artists hang before the show, there were delicious appetizers and drinks. i downed a beer and gobbled up some beef lettuce wraps and fried chicken. i am a total pig when it comes to food, i cannot help it. in the green room, while i was drinking my beer as fast as i could and watched jimmy kimmel being taped live, i felt alive. like myself and i could finally breath again. i am with my kids every day and i appreciate that. i don't take my life for granted but when i don't have a couple hours to myself i can feel like im going over the edge, and in some occasions yes it has happened. so thankful for my hilarious friends to take me on adventures the random days i could get out of the house. love you if you read this far. xo.

I REMINISCE

all these photos were taken the weekend before the mister took off on his european tour. it kinda hurts to have him gone and we're not even half way through the tour. in honesty, i have been missing my man long before he left to europe. it seems as though he's always working and even if he's away from his computer, his mind is somewhere else. sometimes its hard living with a workaholic, but im proud of who he is and what he does. i know what he does is for his family and i am grateful for that. so before he took off i demanded a date night and his mom was nice enough to watch the little ones so we can get out for a couple hours. our day started off kinda slow at home though, the kids and i got caught up playing outside and eating sea salt caramel gelato. oh man, its my new addiction and i hate that i have to share with the kids because you know they're obsessed with it too. on our date we went to lacma and then cha cha cha for dinner, we even had time to go rent a movie from redbox and watch it at home since we were supposed to go to the movie theater. i am lucky to be with this man i love, the father of my children, the man who i admire and daydream about when he is not home. (yes i titled this post after this song)

the last photos were from the next day, we went to the swapmeet and scored luna her very own dora house. and we also went to the worlds slowest car wash. we waited for at least 40 minutes. luna, thanks to her big brother has always been freaked out of the car wash. the last couple times (last year) resulted in screaming terrified children. so this was a huge step for luna not to have any tears, we just had to walk her through it. 

12/52

i have been getting in the habit of taking the kids for a walk every time i have to mail out an order for fancy free. they may be slow, complain, and not listen sometimes but i figure this is the best way to teach them safety while crossing the street or to be patient while running errands. sometimes there's a line at the post office and they wiggle around and complain about being tired but its our thing now. we only have to walk about four blocks but with the sun in our face it sometimes feels like an eternity. we picnicked at the park last week and ran into the cutest little girls, they put on a performance for me singing and dancing "the lollipop guild" and "i whip my hair back & forth" which i had to look up today because it didn't ring a bell but man that was so cute. niko wore those 3d glasses on his forehead all day too.

"a portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2013."

11/52

niko loves "his" puppy. he has a new name and i think its sticking this time. Rocky, niko claims this is his puppy. i hope one day we can have a dog for my little bee. both kiddos love dogs so much, and i am fascinated with the boston terriers but truthfully i don't feel ready to care for another baby. maybe once we move into a house with a yard i'll change my mind. for now, we visit this crazy loving puppy at grandma's house.